This is my first blog. I have been meaning to create my own website for a long time. The last push was listening to Matt Mullenweg on the Tim Ferriss podcast, going to Ma.tt and looking at his birthday wish – which is for everyone to write a blog post.

I also just turned 40. For me 2023 was quite a struggle. I started the year celebrating my mum’s 70th birthday in Australia. That was the first time I’ve seen my family since leaving in 2019. Covid, lockdowns etc. Then in April I celebrated my 4th year anniversary of living in Berlin. During this time I was trying my best to work on my business plans and unfortunately most of them failed. I didn’t give up hope but I was burnt out.

As time went on my mental health started to suffer. I want to be open about this because it might help someone else who’s suffering. By the time the European summer-pause came around I was not doing very well. I forced myself to go to work but I’d really lost all interest. I’ll spare the details but I ended up in hospital with a pretty severe depressive episode. I thought maybe I would stay there for a month. But the weeks kept rolling by and after some treatments and different medication didn’t work I had to stay longer.

This effected everything. Financially it ruined me and I’m still recovering from that aspect but thankfully I was able to get the support of the drum schools I work for and get teachers for my students. Health insurance on the other hand was not that fun.

This is not the first time I’ve had depression episodes but it was the first time that I’ve ever been in hospital. Not only that but in a foreign country. I ended up staying there for 3 months. It was suggested that I go to an out patient day clinic after but I really couldn’t afford to, and I felt ok enough to start teaching again.

I’ve only been back teaching for a month and I still have all the goals and everything that was out of reach for a while. And I have a routine. I meditate and walk every single morning since I’ve been out. I also got to spend xmas at my partner’s parents place and we also just celebrated our 2nd year anniversary.

Perhaps I’ll post more about my plans for this year in an upcoming post. I’m not sure if I’ll post every single day or how this will work out. It’s a new venture that I’m curious to explore.